Tuesday, March 20, 2012

#21 The Sixth Week

Not too soon, the sixth week is here. Which indicates mid terms are coming. 30% of my final grade are from mid term. In fact, one of them is barely three days away. And I'm not prepared.

On top of mid terms to worry and strive for, there are so many other things to deal with. Study wise and personal stuff. And somehow I've come to terms with all these weird things jumping out and scarying me like what the ghosts in horror movies do.

All I can do is grumble, complain and after that just accept that how much I dislike them popping out that way, they are here to stay. Yet there are also things that after I listened, I can just bury them deep down in my heart. I hope that they are biodegradable and they will rot and go away.

But I'm not a four-year-old kid. I know that they are there to stay. They are there to constantly remind me of their existence. They may fade a little. But they are like spores. Once provoked in the condition that they like they appear right in front of your eyes. They are there to haunt me forever.

Sometimes, I'm not sure whether these things are making me more and more heartless. I no longer have the patience to care bout teeny weeny things. I no longer bother bout things that do not concern me. I begin to defend myself more, refusing myself to get hurt anymore. Am I turning more heartless? I do not know, confused indeed. But who to clear my confusion. I wonder whether I am doing the right things, whether I am doing things right.

Next week is a tough week. Three mid terms. Dear God, please help this tiny people get through everything. Please clear my mind and my confusion. Thank you.

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